weirdness

Two super weird things happened at work today, one to me and one to Jim.

First, theres always one 50 year old-i know everything-no time for you asshole in every office, and its always funny to see him compromised. Today Jim was pinching a loaf when this asshole storms into the bathroom, sits down, and starts machine gun blasting the water in the adjacent stall. However, fright turned to hilarity when this jerk's celly rings and he actually picks it up! Jim hears him go "oh shit!" then "ughhhh hello?"....this guy was blasting turds and grunting and taking a work call. At one point he goes "I'm kinda tied up right now". Wow. Jim had to leave ASAP because he was crying laughing.

Later I had to move my car to let some big truck into the parking lot and on the way out these 2 middle age women I work with were joking that I was going to puff smokes with them. We all walk out together and I tell them I wanna smoke a Capitan Black cigar. Then they start asking me "what else do you smoke?". I just kept quiet; but they wouldn't let it go, finally I just go "crack, I smoke crack". Obviously joking. Then out of left, the younger more likely to party one goes "I just put it up my nose". So I'm all "you put crack in your nose?" She goes "no I mean coke". My jaw drops, but I hold my own and say "lets go bump some rails". Her response "anytime". I felt like I was on fuckin coke after that. Was she serious??

Weirdness.