Death Pool

Originally uploaded by jcorn.

Did anyone realize that Jerry Orbach died on Tuesday? He was 69.

This is significant to me for a couple reasons: First; I always thought he did a good job in his roles as a detective on Law And Order and as the father in Dirty Dancing. Second; I didn't even know he was sick, but I suddenly realized that he would have been a great pick to have in a death pool.

What's a death pool?

A death pool is when you and your buddies get together and pick 5-10 well known people(it can't be your grandma), put together some cash, and watch the headlines! The first one to have all his/her picks kick the bucket wins!

I'm interested in starting one. So email me if you want in.

What Have I Done...

CXT-3-full, originally uploaded by jcorn.

Well I have a new job; and apparently I work for the company that produces this monstrosity. Click the picture.

More Shots From The Den

This stuff is just too good to miss. Check out all these shots from Bear Pride Day 2003. Just click on "Pictures".

Inside The Den

For an exclusive shot from inside the Bear's Dean click here

hahahahha

Join The "Bear Club"

bear6
Originally uploaded by jcorn.

Here is an interesting piece of news.

I just found out there is such a thing as a "Bear Club"

This is a club for gay men who are especially big and hairy. Therefore they are known as bears.

In a bear club, members and visitors can get together to share the finer points of big, hairy, gay men.

For more details(and to piss your pants laughing) click here

Rockin'

cornfield
Originally uploaded by jcorn.

Just got flickr and I'm throwin down. I hope this pic doesn't frighten the faint at heart. Its your boy!

Go See This Film

I went to see Closer last night at my local Silver City, and I had no idea what I was getting myself into...

Gripping, powerful, ironic, funny, clever...

All these words would accurately describe this movie, but there is something more to it that is hard put your finger on. It is quite simply the most honest and raw movie I have seen in a long time, and it is excellent at what it tries to do.

Effective might be the best word. Effective at making you think, effective at making you squirm, and definitely really damn good at making you cringe and bite your lip.

Without giving away too much of the plot; this is a story about relatonships gone wrong, then right, then wrong again. Every side of the story is told down to the last minute detail, and at times it is excruciating.

Some outstanding performance here by eveyone. Oscar material if you ask me. Do yourself a favour and check out the trailer.

Also, Closer boasts an outstanding soundtrack featuring the work of Damien Rice. His haunting melodies make an amazing backdrop for the events of this film. Check him out here, and listen to Blower's Daughter. It is also available on the Closer website.

If you have ever been involved with a person of the opposite sex(even the same sex) for a period of more than a few months; go see this film. Although it may have some depressing overtones in the story, the feeling at the end is one of resolution; and besides, everything is done so well it doesn't matter. Worth $13.95.

BIG ASS TITTIE COMMITTEE

just in case you missed it: big ass titties

Get Me Out of This Matrix!

I just realized something frightening. They have sneakily removed a character from the standard computer keyboard sometime since I was born.

I swear there used to be a key for the symbol of cents. Like if I had to write 25 cents.
Where is the symbol!!?? I was under the impression that it used to be shift + 2. But now shift + 2 is @. @!!!! wtf is @??

Oh yeah, we need @ now for email and such. This is a massive sign of the times for me. Appearently the powers that be don't think cents are worth a damn anymore. Well they are. Cents add up, we all know that. Should we just round everything?? This is a god damn conspiracy. I'm freaking out.

Am I wrong??? Let me know.
Maybe it was shift + 5??

Did it ever exist?? Did I have a really retarded keyboard back in the day?

Someone set me striaght. I feel like I'm in the Matrix.
And how am I gonna type cents now?

So many questions.

Duels

Sorry but I just had to get some of this shit out to a wider audience...

• Of the 120,200,000 vostes cast on Election Day, roughly a third were processed by electronic voting machines supplied not by government but by private corporations, at least one of them (Diebold) controlled by a zealous partisan of the Republican Party who made no secret of his wish to bring victory home for the holidays. The software programs enjoyed the protection granted to commercial trade secrets.

• Number of House members in 1979 who voted against making Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday a national holiday: 133
• Number who are still in the House: 9
• Number who are Vice President: 1

• Number of American five-year-olds named Lexus: 353

• Chance that a Japanese grade-school student reports never having seen a sunrise or sunset: 1 in 2

• Hours after Kerry conceded, that a New Yorker posted a personal ad seeking a Bush supporter for a "fair, physical fight": 5
• Number of people who volunteered within twenty-four hours: 3
• Number who asked to watch: 9

Wow, imagine getting so angry at an election result that you send an open ended challenge out to have a physical altercation with a supporter of the opposing side?

Actually wait, maybe this is how everything should be settled. Duels. Lets just have more duels.

Wrong price charged= duel, mean look on the bus= duel, guy cuts you off= duel, dog shits on your lawn= challenge the dog to a duel, I don't like the cut of your jib= duel.

We can even have the Ministry of Dueling, for handeling duel disputes. I bet those would be the best paying jobs; duel dispute handlers.

Come to think of it, duel is one of the words that if you say it too much begins to sound weird and fake. Like elastic. Try saying that 25 times fast. Fuck you up.

I guess what I'm trying to say is ordinary people are getting so shit upon now that they are clearly reduced to such phenomenon as dueling.

ps - that would have been AMAZING to watch.

Late Sunday....

When all you get dealt in online poker is 7's and 3's, you end up with alot of in-between time to tell the internet about your w/e.

Friday night was one of those spur of the moment masterpieces...

Since I missed Death From Above 1979 in Hamilton and Toronto, I decided I should take them in at Call the Office in London if I possibly could. Me, Simon, and Mike hopped in the red rocket and blasted off for jocktown without a second thought. Big ups to Benny Mills for letting us crash at his souped up downtown loft, and for his quick wit and engaging conversation.

Arriving at the club we were unexpectedly greeted by Chris Webden, a man who I had not been informed would be attending. This was a great surprise since he has become rather "T.O." lately. Even better was the fact that he knew the bartender and we got some free booze. All the hapiness and booze eventually caught up with me and I was schmamered by 10.

A band called the Panthers opened for DFA, and they come from Brooklyn. Simon was up front knocking over 17 year old chicks and head banging like a maniac. It was awesome. After that part things get kinda foggy for me. I remember screaming at DFA to give somebody a sticker for free, I remember yelling "oh my god" at some dude that bumped into me, and I remember headbanging with my eyes closed(probably why I bumped into that guy).

The night wrapped up with a trip to GT's, followed by hardcore partying at the Mills' loft until about 7am. All in all a sick night. If you ask Simon he'll tell you there was plenty of "butt blasting"(and he was worried that phrase would creep into our vernacular). What he might not tell you is how he whipped his cock out in the middle of the night and hosed on Mills' coffee table. That news had to come out.

I spent the rest of the weekend recovering, and losing at pro-line. Fuck you football.

It Just Never Ends...

This is worth a look

Give The Gift of Booze!!

We all suffer through the trials and tribulations of Xmas shopping. Frankly, it's hell. So many people to buy for, so many varied tastes, so little time. The mall is crowded, parking is impossible, and if I hear Jingle Bell Rock one more time I swear I'm going to take my own life.

Solution? - Booze

It finally hit me today; booze is the best gift for everyone. Think about it; who doesn't like a nice 26er of their favorite concoction?? In fact, I will go as far as to say this is a frigging breakthrough. I have the answers to all of your Xmas woahs people.......alcohol.

Imagine if I told you that I could take you to a 1 stop shop for all your Xmas needs! Everyone on your whole damn list!(minus the kiddies and pets) Booze works for your parents, your friends, your significant other, his/her parents, the teacher, the family friend, your godmother, that bum downtown....the list goes on and on. Plus, you can buy it all in one place, no nonsense.

Some will prefer a nice pinot noir, others some scotch, and yet still others will throw their arms around you when they find a 40oz bottle of Prince Igor under the tree. Honestly, once you include wine, and some other upscale booze like cognac, and 1000 year old scotch, there isn't anybody you can't make happy this yuletide season.

So do me a favour; instead of complaining, just make your way down to the local LCBO and buy a bunch of booze. And while you're there pick up a bottle for yourself, slug er' back and think about what a genius Josh is. Get drunk and laugh at everyone else running around like idiots.

Happy Holidays

Niagara On The Yang-Tse??

After my other plans fell through, I ended up in Niagara On The Lake this afternoon with my good buddy Bambo. We though we'd do a little shopping(tis' the season), and grab something to eat while we were down there. After a couple blocks a few things became clear to me:
1) everything is over priced
2) everyone is stuffy
3) they don't like dudes with Mohawks
4) they don't often see black people...(refer to the lyrics of Rollin' down Rodeo by RATM)

Now I don't wanna turn this into some massive racial commentary, but walking into those way-too-small, stuffy little specialty stores turns everyone's heads instantly; its just that today I got alot more weird looks than usual. I was sporting a Mohawk and I was with a gentleman of colour.

Now that I've had a couple jobs and been a couple places I've finally begun to realize that you truly can't judge people by what they look like. That guy dressed all shabby has a platinum card, and the dude in the suit whips out 3 cards that all decline. The man in the beat up pick up truck owns a multi million dollar corporation, and the chick in the nice new Lexus is days away from having it re-possesed. The dude with the Mohawk is probably alot smarter than you, and his black friend is inclined to steal jack shit. Obviously, its true that you can judge people by their appearence, and hey maybe its even cool to crack wise behind their back, but treating them different off the bat is just stupid and you are always the one who loses out in the end.

So here's where I'm going with this and why the post is a combo Ontarian city and Chinese river:

Eating in NOTL is damn expensive, so we decided the local Chinois restaurant would be best. Before we even got in I could see the sign that said "washrooms are for customers", and "if you aren't ordering at least $10 worth of food, don't bother" etc... I was pretty sure we had those bases covered, so in we strolled. BAM!!! this dude is all in our faces;

"can I help you?"
"2 for lunch please"
"did you see the menu outside?"
"yeah, looks good"
"so do you need menus? **** of course we do dickhead
"yes we do"
"but you looked outside.."
"yeah we looked.."
"oh so you want menus and a table?"

At this point the guy is still blocking our way into the place and i'm about to snap on him. Obviously if I was wearing an ascot like all the rest of the clientel in this over-priced excuse for a Mandarin I wouldn't be having this problem....so I cop an attitude:

"Is it ok if we eat lunch here?"
"yes, yes it just that some people come in and--"
"yeah"

And then the guy just kinda trailed off.

Buddy, you aren't selling Fabrege eggs...stop being such a cock.

Today made me realize what some people go through all the time. Its disgraceful. And the food was half-assed. I will never go back there. This guy was beyond apprehensive, he was just rude. So what if I have a Mohawk, and so what if I'm with a black dude(who incidentally looked like he belgoned on Wall St. at that particular moment), I'm still gonna order lunch and pay for it.

this is why I distrust Chinese people. hahahahaha.